1.31.2011

A traveler's compromise

I like to travel. I think we've adequately established that. I spend most of my free time thinking of my next trip, whether it's a weekend trip up to Westchester or a trip across the Atlantic. Planning trips, perfecting itineraries and discovering deals to places I never even thought of visiting until right that moment makes me happy. It's my go-to when I'm particularly anxious or stressed out.

My boyfriend, the wonderful and lovely man that he is, is not in any way whatsoever passionate about travel. Sure, he'll do it (a lot of the time to oblige my travel bug) but he doesn't get excited by it. I'm not even saying to the degree that I do — he's just not all that into it.

Me and my travel buddy, Sheila, showcasing our
"I've seen Mt. Everest" certificates
When we started our relationship a bit more than one (very wonderful, mind you) year ago, we discussed that while he would NEVER want to join me on a trip to, say, India or Southeast Asia, he also would never stop me from going. Lucky for me I have a friend who's a particularly good traveling buddy who's just as crazy as I am about the whole thing. She currently is spending several months trekking through South America. Yes, I'm incredibly jealous.

Anyway, the fact that my man doesn't want to travel to some more out of the ordinary places is OK. I'm just as happy exploring the beauty of Europe and maybe, just maybe, Japan and/or Australia one day. Oh, if only things were that easy.

If you're a travel nut, like me, you know that no matter how dire financial straits might be, you find a way to make it work. (I've even outlined in an earlier post some of the ways that I, personally, am able to travel as much as I do, to the amazement of many of my more well-off friends.) If you're not a travel nut, like my boyfriend, then justifying spending $2,000 on one week of schlepping around Ireland doesn't really sound all that appealing — he'd much rather take that money and spend it on comic books. As he very astutely phrased it, that's where the two of us differ most greatly in our personalities: he would rather spend his money on tangible assets, whereas I am much happier spending it on experiences. 

And therein lies the rub.

Relaxing after snorkeling in Grand Cayman
Another issue is that I am a very active traveler. My philosophy is that if I already spent that much of my hard-earned and not-so-easy-to-come-by money to get to a place, I might as well take full advantage of it and see as much as possible. My boyfriend, like many normal people, prefers to actually relax on his vacations. Perhaps that's why he was less combative about our trip to Grand Cayman than he's being about my very jam-packed itinerary for Ireland.

Luckily, we both love each other enough to compromise, which I hear is what a successful relationship is all about. He has agreed to — perhaps begrudgingly, but I choose to ignore that — go on my trip to Ireland; I have agreed to go to as many book stores as he wants to visit while we're there.

In the future, I'll just have to either plan my vacations with my man locally and around certain comic conventions (see Weekend Getaways: Chicago and Philadelphia), or I'll have to capitalize on his love of boats and plan many more cruise vacations. Not a problem, considering I also enjoy cruises.

It's all about compromise.

Have any tips on how to get some more unwilling parties to comply with your traveling needs?